Sunday, July 16, 2006

Tiny Feats

My cousin sister's little daughter was attending her very first Interview for a seat in Nursery, at the XYZ Convent school, a school that has the distinction of churning out some really good girls and some really bad examples like me. So it was with utmost concern for my niece, that I refused to accompany them for the interview. Of course I didn’t tell them why, but with a record a mile long at this very institution, I didn’t think anyone related to me would be allowed within a mile of its hallowed walls.

It all started with my very first interview here, many years ago.

Sister: What is your name?
Me: I won’t tell you.
Mom: *gasp*
Dad: Ha! Ha! Ha….hum? er…sorry.
Sister: I will give you a Lollypop if you tell me your name.
Me: Yech, I hate lollypop.
Mom: *gasp*
Dad: *guffaw*

By the time the Interview was over, my mom’s face was an ashen color and Dad’s was a robust red from trying to control laughter. Anyways...due to the several rosaries recited by my Mom and her sisters on my behalf I got in and was put in Ms F’s class. My class teacher Miss F was a sweetheart, fresh out of college, brimming with confidence and a teachers training certificate to boot. She didn't last long.

Teacher: Girls please take out your coloring books!
Girl 2: Did you see the circus?
Girl 3: No
Girl 2: There was a big elephant.
Teachers: Girl, please please take out your coloring books .
Girl 2: And there was a joker too.
Girl 4: Really?
Girl 2: Yes and horses too.
Teacher: Girls *sob* please *sob* take out your books *sob*
Girl 1: I am going to ask my daddy to take me to the circus
Girl 2: And they have Ice Cream too.
Girl 3: Do they have dancing Zebras too?
Teacher ( banging her head on the table):Waaaaaaaah!!!

Miss F left, scarred for life, vowing never to teach kindergarten girls again. She joined the Nursery Section of the boy’s school next door where she was reportedly very happy.

The Nursery section is a separate enclosed area with its own playground, and a small Zoo with a sad looking peacock as its one and only incumbent. Its manliness, the long and colorful tail was stripped to the butt by determined little girls trying to catch him by the tail. The zoo was once populated with various animals that did not figure in the Endangered Species List like rabbits, budgerigars, pigeons, a crow etc. Alas, this too didn't last very long.

Girl 5: Miss, can I go see the birds?
New Teacher: Ok dear!
Girl 5 (coming back after 5 seconds): *sob* they ran away.
Teacher: Oh my God what did you do???
Girl 5: I took them for a walk *sniff*
Girl 6: Miss the fish in the tank is swimming funny!
New Teacher: Oh my God now what happened?
Girl 5: *snifff* I was feeding the fish that’s all.
New Teacher: What did you give it dear?
Girl 6: My lunch *bawl*
School Maid: Miss you had better come out see this, someone is throwing the rabbits down the slide.
New Teacher: *swoon*

After this incident the Zoo was put on the Gravely Endangered list of Zoos by the school management and we got a new teacher Miss T. Miss T lasted one whole period.

Miss T: Ok girls, I am going to be very strict and I will take no nonsense from any of you!
Girl : What is nonsense?
Miss T: er…lets learn to count today, take out your numbers book.
Girl : What is nonsense?
Miss T: Now Pinky, don’t ask silly questions and take out your number book.
Girl : What is a silly question?
Miss T: Shut up!!!
Girl : *sob*

After Miss T, a long line of fresh inexperienced young wannabe teachers came brimming with confidence and went brimming with despair, battle scarred and much wiser from the experience. With moiself involved in more than one escapade mentioned above, you can understand my reluctance to be seen anywhere in the vicinity of the school. It was with relief that I heard that my niece had got a seat in the school. But my happiness was cut short when my cousin sister told me that my niece had blurted out that her aunt was an ex student of the school.
To which, Sister turned to her and said smartly “Really? Well let’s see if we can do better with you !”


Ganja Turtle said...

cheap thrills,bur aashik...but i wudnt have said dat if I was!

what would Catholic wimmen ever do without their rosaries ;-)

No wonder teachers are so frustrated in life! And groom surly men who become ur bosses...y dya do this? Now look at what we have to do...until we find a nu job!

Just Jane said...

hehehehe....good on that nun who liked to take on a challenge!

Anonymous said...

This was real cute and bought back so many memories.... :) Liked the subtle sense of humor in this one..
uh oh just realised I am posting Anon ;-)


T E Zacharias said...

:)) Brought back memories... *sigh*

Maverick said...

if ur niece is anywhere near ur type hope she will be having enough alphabets to name her teachers :))))

sheeh ur post made me wish......
if only i could return to my innocence.sigh!

Unknown said...

My kindergarden used to be a really cool one...lot of paintings on the wall...used to look and get lost in dreams...i guess that habit has'nt died yet!

Ganja Turtle said...

And the title was cute "tiny feats"...can imagine!

anup.777 said...

nice! ... too bad my school didn't have a zoo ... it would've been so cool!

Nikhil Narayanan said...

ninakk valla cinema script um ezhuthikkodey???

~*. D E E P A .* ~ said...


an update ?

goody good ! reading it is the 1st on my agenda tomm ... :)

c ya ... gonna sleep now

b v n said...

its true...we guys used to be very quiet n smug faced in KG classes...gals used to have a field our school we had rabbits,tortoise and i think a python too...but gals never touched any of these...they were afraid....but yeah,still they were noisy...with those shrill voices

shruti said...

nicely written ...I loved school always ... and I have been very fond of studyin but can relate somewht to wht u wrote .. he he ..I loved the tiffin time the most !!
Cant remeber much of nursery

shruti said...

oh yes ,,but I was quite naughty as a kid ..remeber my fav thing in school was to climb up the wall in the playgroud which was banned but I loved the thrill .. ofcourse I was a perpectual latecomer ( still am ) and they way me and my twin used to get into school wasnt an adventure in itself ..

Jeseem said...

so they remember you from such a long time back. U really had some good deeds in there in past :-P

Mind Curry said...

i think if they knew you were her aunt, your niece would have got double-promotion or direct entry to grade I.

hmm..i see sisters have to learn a wee bit..and perhaps rephrase their question as follows:

Sister: I will give you a Breezer if you tell me your name.

oh mann..pj..i shall stop!

this was hilarious btw!

silverine said...

Aashik: :p

Ganja Turtle: The rosary saved my neck many a times :)) hmm now we
know how bad bosses are made, and it has nothing to do with the employees :))

Aashik: On my first day, I skipped into school while my parents
watched teary eyed :))

the chosen one: That nun is the one who housebroke me :)

Anon and connors corner: Hope it bought back good memories :)

Maverick: LOL we did go through all the alphabets twice over :p

Rockus: Tell me about it, it was the best days of my life too!

GT: Thank you, it should have been 'little feats'

Anup: Too bad, it really helps when you are shown the animals instead of seeing them in books. We used to be taken to Russel Market to the pet shops and I was lucky to see an owl. Then came Menaka Gandhi and now they sell only birds bred for the pet market :)

Nikhil: Thanks buddy!

Deepa: Sweet dreams dear :)

b v n: You are right, the teachers used to say that it was so much easier teaching boys than girls :) We were noisy, nosy, talkative and as my brother used to say "little grandmothers" :))

shruthi: lol me too, successfully scaled many walls to pluck flowers :))I go and help out on Sports Day and visit school at least once a month so am in touch with most of the staff. Plus I am a member of the past students association.

Jaseem: I am a regular there, in fact most old students help out for the various functions :)

Mind Curry : ROFL I am calling sister today and nominating you on the Interview board :))))
That was a good one doc!!!! Still laughing LOL

silverine said...

Alexis: They were a battle hardened teachers. Teaching little girls is not a piece of pink iced cake I am told :)

~*. D E E P A .* ~ said...

haaa haaaa

which class is ur niece in now ?
and do they still have the animals ?

a rabbit down a slide .. wow !

If I tell ya, I'll have to kill ya said...

You've brought out such sepia-toned memories Sil...

I was like you. Skipped into school happily while my parents watched in shock. Mom was thrilled. Dad was upset...

And when they came to pick me up in the afternoon I howled cause I wanted to ride home in the little tin rickshaw with the other kids.

I was also called "grandmother" :)) Guess all little girls are. And I regularly beat up little boys :)))))))

Anonymous said...

BTW - When my son wanted to get an admission in a school in Chennai, they interviewed the parents. And we failed our son. Come to think of it, I don't know of any who got through, but I know quite a few who failed. Maybe we should start a "Failed Interview association" like the "Old Boys association".
And my school in Trivandrum had a phyton whcih was fed rats once a week!! :-)

pophabhi said...

Great post, as usual! Being silent can mean notorious. Me being pretty silent in kindergarten classes, no wonder my teachers and parents were surprised when I grouped a bunch of mischevious kids and lead them to hitting the blues out of a group of kids who were ragging my cousin in lower KG - that too without even laying my finger on anyone!

verbaltorture said...

Wonderfully written.
And yes, I was known for beating up li'l boys. The boys even had an un-publishable nick for me :(

Dhanush | ധനുഷ് said...

My Sympathies with the sister, who is hoping to make your niece better than you.
May Lord show mercy on her :)

Lol. Cute Post.

Inder said...

ha.. ha... nice one.
i don't remember anything i did at kindergarten excepy my rickshaw trips to and fro the nursery and a sports day meet with wonderful games liek - balance-lemon-on-spoon, hop-till-finish-line, blow-the-flour-to-get-the-chocolate-below. probably i slept through my kindergarten years.

Anonymous said...

Noisy guys or gals can be mischevious, but their mischief will never surprise anyone... Its the quiet ones who cause more damage than their loud counterparts... With a little help from Captain Jack Sparrow I will say "A mischevious loud kid you can always trust to be mischevious. Honestly. It's the quiet ones you want to watch out for, because you can never predict when they're going to do something incredibly MISCHEVIOUS."

On a serious note, one of my kid brother's college mate turned out to be a terrorist in the making... He was very much involved in the anti social activities and only when he went missing from the college, people came to know about him... And mind you he was one of the quiet ones whom you could easily miss in a crowd...

Unnikrishnan G Nair.

Goan Pao said...

I remember my younger bro ran out of the interview screaming Devil is there.. devil is there.. at our principal who was dressed in a black robe.
My Mom gets shivers to this day when she is reminded of that incident.
Fortunately, after the principal realised it was my brother he accepted his admission...
but I think it was to get back at me and let my parents know of my deeds in school.

starry said...

That was a nice post.I think teaching is really hard especially if the kids dont listen, need lots of patience.I think I was one of those talkative kids in class.had to stand in the corner many times.

Ekta said...

That sounds sooo cute
Loved the post...adorable!

joseph said...

Makes me remember what my sis told her teacher in UKG. "Sisternu vere pani illathondalle ee homework tharane. sister thanne cheytho".. which was actually said by an irritated mommy to a sleeping small baby trying to finish her homework which includes pages and pages of writing....
Nice post :)

Kurur said...

Did you go to a school or a Juvenile Delinquency Home? :-) Good read!

silverine said...

Deepa: My niece is in Nursery, she joined in June :) They have recently repopulated the zoo with stronger cages lol I wanted to comment on your latest post because I have some strong views on the same but blogger seems to be playing up and I cant open most blogs :(

I I tell ya girl: This Interview was like a pandora's box of memories for me too :) lol so you too skipped happily inside? I refused to go home after school and kicked up a tantrum . After a week I realised that I would be coming back every morning and then went home quietly :p

Browser:Actually that is very sad, I mean interviewing the parents. Here in my school it is the kids who are interviewed and the interview is very interesting. I was asked to name objects kept in a tray like , lock, key, comb and identify colors etc. Basically they need to see if you can take the rigors of ICSE syllabus and I think it is very fair to check the child. Inspite of this we had a fair amount of dropouts halfway through.I have heard so much about that Python!! It is Loyola isn't it?

Pophabhi: How clever of you :)) Supari at such a young age or should we credit you with starting 'supari' ? lol

verbaltorture: I was in an all girls school so no chance of hitting little boys :p I would love to know the nick though :))

dhanush: LOL

Inder: The sports day is something I remember vividly cos I won a chocolate in some race :)

Unnikrishnan G Nair: I think Pophabhi has proved your theory correct :)) But what you say is true I heard.

Goan Pav: Amazing but I remember someone doing the same thing...not running out but thinking that the black habit Nun was the devil :)) I think my niece too got in cos now the Nuns have something to dangle on my head :p

Starry Nights: If I could I would be a KG teacher. My whole class was exceptionally talkative and it continued till 10th :)

Ekta: thank you dear :)

Jofu; Welcome to my blog :) Your sister's remark takes the cake!!!!! LOL

Jagan said...

oh gawd ..after 20 years ur niece will start writing blogs ..oh no me!!!

Anonymous said...

Yup, you got the school right.

mathew said...

are all ur folks of the same ilk!!! ;)

Seems like ur teachers badly wanted to forget u and then u reminded them its a vicious circle!!!...hahaha..nice payback!!

pavaam sister!!!!

Praveen said...

LOL :), its nice to know that you had a wonderful "sense of humor" right from nursery school ;)

silverine said...

Jagan: No one can help you dear muahahahHAHAHA :p

Browser: That Python is famous!

Mathew: Payback time indeed :))

praveen: Thanks :))

Jiby said...

u reminded me of my ukg interview...i just turned my back to the principal pulled my shorts down and started scratching my ass!!!

Ganja Turtle said...

No "tiny" was just purrfect...

Ganja Turtle said...

and its now prose...easier!!

രാജ് said...

ഇതു ‘ആര്‍ച്ചീസ്’ പോലെ ഇരിക്കുന്നല്ലോ, പക്ഷെ നന്നായി എഴുതിയിരിക്കുന്നു. എന്തായാലും ‘സില്‍‌വി’ ആ വഴിക്കു പോകാഞ്ഞതു നന്നായി ;)

Wanderlust said...

I understand that the government has banned all blogging.I hope they revert this stupid decision and we get to see more of your writing soon enough.

silverine said...

Jiby: lol so cute :))

GT: Ok 'tiny' it is :) Shall attempt the prose mebe this weekend .

Peringodan: Thank you :)

Amitabha: We can always reach blogs via and :) But I too hope that they revert the decision. This govt. seems to be getting more autocratic by the day!

Kusum Rohra said...

Lol if they can do better with her, we all will get her blog printed as a new age requiste for healthly living.

Thanks a lot for your mail informing about the ban, I was so stuck in work I didn't realise that I am not being able to see my blog because of the ban.

In other news the ban has been lifted :)so happy blogging.

~*. D E E P A .* ~ said...

well ,all is fine now.

but , my enthusiasm to blog is gone now !

i read ur comments .. wanted to reply .. but like i said my enthu is in a all time low ( not so much .. but still )

newayz , have one thing bothering me .. am gonna write that tomm / day after ... after that , lemme see

Anonymous said...

All the while I imagined a piggy tailed girl, with a big pout and brooding eyes, peeping at her teacher ....

Terminally Insane said...

Hey good one.. I'll visit again here more often..

I myself am not known to have happy teachers n profs in my studying days !!

Good work..

silverine said...

Kusum: Thanks gurl !! I am missing all my blog pals blogs :( I am hoping too that the ban will be lifted, then I can post a new one :)

Deepa: Yeah, this ban is a dampner, me too don't feel like posting. Hopefully things will be allright by tomorow!

rushesanomaly: Piggy tailed ..yes. Pout? ..No, I was always talking away nineteen to dozen to have time to pout :))

terminaly insane: Your name just described me :p Thanks for dropping by :)

Emmanuel said...

it was really a nice piece of writing........the tiny feats of the tiny "tots" is always really nice to hear because even at 21, i hear from my mom about my 'feats' at that age which i don't even remember a bit....and i don't know why is it so interesting......

Kusum Rohra said...

Aare silver read my precious comment again the ban has been lifted :)

Dreamer said...

It takes tons of patience to be a KG teacher.. The easiest one to be taught are the PG students.. Its not about confidence, Its more of strategy..

Thanks a lot for the memories Sil.

(Pss: Do ya know how to handle a drunk person? Treat them like a KG student.. he/she thinks the same way! Having said that, drunk women are the worst to handle)

silverine said...

Emmanuel: My teachers never let me forget my misdeeds :))

Kusum: My ISP was the last to lift the ban!

dreamer: Actually this Interview triggered this post and I must thank my niece for the post :) I agree, it takes tons of patience and my school has some really experienced teachers!

Unknown said...

Once I had spilt gum on my teachers' seat...
tahst what mom says...
but I thought It was "itching powder"....

Muhammad Riyaz said...

Hilarouos. Neverthless I guess this is not too much of exaggerations. My daughter went to a Bangalore International school, which had nothing but the name to make it international. In her kindergarden class, they had tests every week and the teacher was telling them "no cheating" She comes and ask me "Whats cheating?"