Sunday, October 28, 2007

Weekend blues

There are those days when all goes well and even God seems to be taking a nap from his 24/7 vigil of the Universe, especially of the troublesome beings on planet Earth. Those are the days when you settle into the comfortable routine of bliss, bliss and more bliss …you forget the tough days and sometimes even *gasp* grumble about the uneventful pace of you life. And then wham!!! God wakes up and realizes to his horror that his people have become too complacent and fiddles with the buttons and knobs on his heavenly console to put the fear of God in us again.

I was having a really nice Saturday yesterday, my third nice Saturday in a row when my grandma’s youngest sister dropped in.


Ammachi: Why are you home? You don’t have a job?

Me: Today is Saturday ammachi. It is a non working day.

Ammachi: *snort* I never heard such a thing before!! Young people like you should be working and not resting at your age.

Me: No you don’t understand…

Ammachi: Where is your brother working now?

Me: Same company ammachi.

Ammachi: And Molly’s son Vincent?

Me: Infosys

Ammachi: In... fo...????

Me: Infosys!!

Ammachi: What?

Me: In....fo....sy......is

Ammachi: *grumble* What a name!! And Benny?

Me: Accenture!

Ammachi: Huh?

Me: Ack…sen… chur!

Ammachi: *blank expression*

Me (patiently): That’s a company ammachi!

Ammachi: hmm

Me: I gotta go now ammachi...

Ammachi (imperiously) : Sit down!!!

Me (meekly): Ok ammachi.

Ammachi: Where is Rohan now?

Me: IIM

Ammachi: Huh!

Me (shouting): Eye Eye Yem!!!!

Ammachi: *grumble* You don't have to shout you know!! I am not deaf!! And where is Sebastian now?

Me: ITC

Ammachi: What?

Me: %$#& Malabar Beedi

Ammachi: Oh! And Betsy?

Me: Kerala Rubber Factory (She is with an IT co in Mumbai)

Ammachi: And Korah?

Me: Kochi Industries (he is with a Bank in Delhi)

Ammachi: Ende daivamey!! (OMG)

Me: What happened?

Ammachi : That Sebby, Betsy and Korah!!! *lowering her voice* They are not doing too well are they?

Me: *censored*

Guess who all are not talking to me since yesterday! *sigh*

37 comments:

mathew said...

hehehe..this reminds me of my friend who was travelling in abus from mysore to cochin..and the person sitting on his side asked..
"Mone..where do you work?"
"Infosysil aa.."
"oh..enikkum ariyaam..the one in wayanad..busil povumbol kandittu ondu."
*he was momentarily dumbstuck*

forget the part of explaining the part of where you work..the really challenge is explaining what you work on..

"Ammachi..i am working in Java"
"ohoo..appachanum ondayirunnu pandu oru java.."

mathew said...

Me: ITC

Ammachi: What?

Me: %$#& Malabar Beedi

ROTFL!!.. ;-P

~==[[[ Abhi ]]]==~ said...

Comparison of the millennium: ITC=Malabar Beedi

Other's were also too damn good. I've had a tough time explaining my new job. Its in IFFCO and when i tell it they look back with a awkward face. So i say "Ayyo this is just a BIG variety of FACT @ Kochi. Just that they have many branches in India"

Adorable Pancreas said...

Malabar beedi? Athrayum venarunno? Poor Sebastian! :P

silverine said...

mathew: lol!! Poor lady...cant blame her with so many names to remember nowadays. About explaining what you do I did try once and failed miserably :p

Abhi: That was a neat way of explaining what you do :))

AP: :p

Amey said...

My guess would be Sebby, Betsy and Korah, their parents and Ammachi, at the least. Am I right?

Oops, sorry, that wasn't supposed to be answered. My bad :(

Alexis said...

Nice one. Kerala Beedi, Kerala Rubber Company...ROTFL

@mathew: the java episode was a nice one...LOL

priya said...

amid much fanfare, i got an r&d job at samsung india.
My grandmother goes around telling people now that i've got a job selling (samsung) washing machines and televisions door to door and that she has no idea why everyone is rejoicing so much!

Hammy said...

Reminds me of my engineering days...

"Where are you working now?"

"Err.. I'm studying, aunty..."

"Oh? Joli onnum kittiyilla alle?"

"...?..."

"Potte... Evideya padikkunne?"

"CITV ... under CUSAT... cochin university"

"hmm... collegil onnum kittiyillallyo?"

"...?..."

I'm surprisingly having more luck with work related enquiries, though....

"Where am I working? I'm a Research Executive for the Qualitative Division in Hansa Research pvt ltd, Bangalore Wing..."

That usually silences them up...
The trick, as you can see, is to make the answer ridiculously long...

Anonymous said...

I am working as Accommodations Manager in Oberoi. And you can imagine the questions I get.

" Hotel joli oo ? Kannaku ezuthu anno ?" !?!

Rebecca

wanderlust said...

a friend of mine went to his village and one of the oldies there asked
'enthina padikkunne?'
'CA'
'Oh, BA-ykku kittiyilla alle?'

Anonymous said...

I am an accountant and when I face rude questions like these, I say my job is 'koottikkodupp'. That seems to work as long as you are dealing with a mallu. ;-)

sunith said...

ROTFL!! :) Thankfully God spared me this weekend. Infact I was able to work some mallu bonding at Empire on church street at one 0 clock in the night in-order to jump the queue and get a table. Caught hold of the head waiter and started coaxing him in tharra malayalam to get me a table for 15 people. Either my persuasion skills improved ten fold under the influence of alchohol or the guy was just a kind ol mallu.(you do find a lot of these specimens in Bangalore) I got a table within 10 minutes! Apologies for all who were shooting daggers at me that day :P

PS: I work in the wicked night shift and your blog has helped a lot in staying awake and passing the time during the last 2 months.. Thanks :D

hope and love said...

:))
U r the limit..!!

scorpigle said...

awesome!!! :) ROTFL

Janus said...

your blog is the instant pick-me up that gives a me a feeling that all is well in the world, everytime I have read it. Kudos once again :)

silverine said...

fleiger: You are forgiven ;)

alexis: :p

priya: lol!! I believe that!

hammy: :)) That is a good idea.Must use it next time!

Rebecca: Thank god they don't think you are a nautch dancer or somthing like that, quite a possibility :))

wanderlust: lol!!

Anon: He must have looked at you with pity or derision if it was a mallu :)

sunith: Thank you. It works with me too when I go to Empire :)

HnL: :p

scorpigle: Thank you, guess you got the jist of ammachi's last line :))

janus: Thanks buddy :)

Amey said...

So I am guessing you will now be working on Saturdays, too?

Oops sorry... forgot. You are a manager now. So I guess you will be working less now.

Incidentally, is onsite = working in Dubai?

Iceman said...

ROTFLMAO!

Iceman said...

Reminds me when some one asked me what do I do...

I said "Aerospace Engineer"

I dint bother 2 explain what was that, instead I told I was a cleaner of air-planes!

LMAO! Sometimes it fun dealin with geriatrics! If u have the patience!

jithesh said...

When i went to Madras to do PG from a reputed college, many of my relatives asked me "entha graduationu marks kuravayirunno? naattiley collegil onnum admission kittiyilley?"
Should have consulted you at time:-)

Padakkam said...

ROTFL... i can sooo relate to that..
when ammachis and aunties ask me, mone where are u working "Procter & Gamble" Ammachi... "Athennatha mone",
Me... "Ammachi, I sell Pantene, Whisper, Vicks etc"
Ammachi... "Appo salesman aanalle"
and she gives u a look partly in sympathy and partly in puzzlement...

silverine said...

Amey: One chamaat for you :p

iceman: lol!!! The oldies are so cute arent they? :))

jithesh: LOL!!! Poor you :)

padakkam: Thank you dear :) That 'whisper" thingie had me cracking up. I hope you never get to know what they are talking behind your back :p

Annie: She sure is!!! :p

Amey said...

Ouch... is that a new managing style?

Prats said...

How did you think up such answers....god its so hilarious.
The malabar beedi was a beaut....would never have thought up that one...heheheh

silverine said...

Amey: Exclusively wonly for you :))

Prats: Thank you! Thats called 'quick thinking on the feet in the mouth syndrome' :p

Totto said...

awesome observation.. hats off.
migration is so common that even amachis are aware..of its pros.

Totto said...

awesome observation,hats off.

Srinivas said...

lol.. to date my mom cant tell where i work. and she has it written it down somewhere gok why..

പെരിങ്ങോടന്‍ said...

:-)

പണ്ടിതുപോലെ പള്ളിയില്‍ വച്ചു ഒരു അമ്മച്ചിയെ കണ്ടതു് എഴുതിയിരുന്നില്ലേ ;-)

Roshan said...

That was funny. Little old ladies from Kerala are supposed to drive you mad, right? It's the law of nature.

B & S said...

s a true bred Keralite, I totally totally agree and echo the frustration. Good luck, ye soldier~

Alameen said...

Too much silverine.....
ROTFL!!
Malabar beedi... Had a nice laugh after a long time...

My friend got campus placement from IIM. He phoned his grandma to inform the good news.

Fred: 'GMa, I've a good news to share. I got a job'
GMa: 'I am really happy for you son. Where did you make it to?'
Fred: I got into 'ICICI Securities
GMa: [Silence]

Do I need to explain more?

Alameen said...

Another time, I had a tough time explaining the work I do in software company. A seminar in my company by Airbus project guys almost helped me to explain softwares used in Aeroplanes. After a difficult time, aunt was explaining the same to her husband that I make Aeroplanes in Bangalore :)...

OOOpss..
I should've wrote a blog altogether on this...

Keep penning Silverine
AlAmeen

Dagny said...

lovely!
hilarious!

King Vishy said...

"Malabar beedi" :D :D ROFLOL..

BTW am surprised your granny did not know Infy! The people who drill me about my job know only three IT companies: Infy, TCS, CTS. The moment I tell them I do not work for any of those companies, they start avoiding me like the plague. And internally brand me as "loser" in their minds.

Karthik Sivaramakrishnan said...

LOL!