Sunday, October 21, 2007

Service with a smile and lots of grimace

Dear Ms Anjali,

Just a small Notepad to let you know that the IT Help Desk will receive complaints from 9 am to 8 pm ONLY regarding your PC/Laptop/Network etc ONLY! For the 457th time, we are giving you a list of services we do and do not do. Kindly note that:

1. We do not do DVD writing of movies.

2. It doesn’t matter if you are not going to sell it but use it at home

3. And no, we do not want to keep a copy. Thank you for the offer.

4. Please stop coming to our desk and pouting. The guys here are human you know!

5. Stop calling me DHMS. ( Disturbingly Handsome Mallu Sysadmin)

6. Of course I know you call me that.

7. And I do like it I admit.

8. Hope you mean it.

9. hehe I am blushing ( p.s do you really mean it? Ping me)

10. We have given you 456 mouse till date.

11. And 567 Data Cables.

12. Where are they?

13. Please do not use the Internal Messenger to diss your boss.

14. He is a bloody pain in the butt I agree.

15. If I ever find his laptop alone …never mind

16. Windows XP is dead. So quit whining and make do with Windows Vista.

17. And since you use Windows Vista, please back up your files every hour on a DVD/CD/External HDD/USB

18. Your laptop battery is being used by RS. You are using PC’s laptop battery. Your LCD screen being used by IA and your DVD reader has to be returned to NM. Please surrender your present Lappie LCD Screen as it belongs to PS, the extra 1 GB RAM belongs to SS and he needs it urgently. We will give you RK’s laptop till GH is back from Timbuktoo. He is currently using your laptop motherboard.

19. There is no need to nail your external monitor onto your table. We are not going to replace it with the really bad ones we keep in our cupboard.

20. Please remove the cute little bunny sticker from your laptop when you give it for repairs. We will not be responsible if it is misplaced.

22. Stop calling me from different extensions so that I will pick up your call. It is downright sneaky!!!!

23. And stop hiding behind pillars to catch me. That's highly unfair!!

24. And *sigh* please stop leaving notes in the Smoking Area for me. I swear I read all your service request mails before I delete them.

26. Please call me when you bring chakka and meen curry for lunch.

25. I know you won’t but… did you know we are expecting a shipment of the new Nokia phones soon? You don’t want to be stuck with that old junk do you? Heh heh

26. And last but not the least, WE DO NOT ISSUE BOSE SPEAKERS!

Warm regards,

Sysadmin

Service is our motto!



Yep, you guessed right. It is ‘bash-your-sysadmin’ week again!

21 comments:

Rockus said...

Cool!
and I thought girls usually get all the things done by the system admins, pronto!

btw...what did u do with those mice and cables?

mathew said...

Having a BOSE speaker in office is our birth right..there is nothin wrong in that!!;-P

and btw ofcoz we do expect upgrade in memory space..where do I keep all the movie after all!!

Fleiger said...

Seriously, is there a big mouse' nest in your office somewhere built with all those cables? Kind of like in Jurassic Park where the velociraptors are nesting?

Adorable Pancreas said...

One phrase stood out, the rest was a haze. No offence, but 'disturbingly handsome' and 'mallu'. Me likes that very much. Any pics? ;)

Hyde said...

Try asking for Bose headphones instead.

Anphy said...

downright funny :D

Hammy said...

Ah. The often overlooked and until now undocumented tactic of making a better life in office by stalking the admin guy.... Interesting. Won't work for me, though. Don't have large enough pillars to hide behind...
:)

Alexis said...

Nice one. The poor guy must be very miserable...

Bose speakers at the office. You are not asking much...

Cool post. Convey the DHMS my condolences :-)

cOOL_aLIEN_fRM_mARS said...

lol....but seriously be glad you don't have a bofh ;)

Abhilash said...

u rock silverine :) U write a really good blog.

Cheers!

~==[[[ Abhi ]]]==~ said...

Cute little bunny sticker jus made u "Gal next door"!

Hiding behind pillars to catch him, chakka and meen curry treats, givin him funny names like DHMS; something smells fishy here. Admin nalla achayan payyans aano?

silverine said...

rockus: The mice and cables are in the dustbin :p

mathew: lol!! A fellow sufferer I see :p

flieger: In the dustbin :)

AP: Sorry but he is none of the described :p

hyde: I have, no luck. He has some brands he swears by :)

anphy: Thank you :)

hammy: I will soon be bringing out a guidebook on getting your sysadmins attention :) Calling him from different extns is just the tip of the iceberg :p

Alexis: He is one miserable fellow lol!!!

cafm: I wouldn't called him the B word but he is a pain alright! :)

abhilash: Thanks buddy :)

Abhi: He is not.

Fleiger said...

Aah, and what are all those things doing there?

And if you called (bribed) the SysAdmin with chakka and meen curry, then I am sure you won't have any problems keeping your laptop together ;)

claytonia vices said...

We used to have a mallu sys admin in my previous workplace and he used to have a long beard and had a rich baritone voice with which he used to answer the phone with a long 'heloooooo'.

the rain tree said...

awesome n unbeatable as usual....
im sitting next to symadm as a temp arrangement...i guess i will show him this :P....he really needs some self-awarness/realisation

Adorable Pancreas said...

Damn! I knew it was too good to be true.

So I read the rest of the post in avery depressed state of mind and found it enjoyable.

Damn!

jedi said...

DHMS.. shud remember tht one. *Beaming to the hilt and caressing my mirror*

Harish said...

Consistently terrific office humour. Nice.

Vikram Nandwani said...

One Word - Awesome :D
I almost fell off my chair laughing

esp. point no. 22 & 23 felt extremely nostalgic

Alameen said...

point no: 26..
Do you really have chakka and meen curry for lunch?? :P

Karthik Sivaramakrishnan said...

=))