Monday, February 02, 2009

In the line of ire

A Prominent Journalist (PJ) working for a television news channel owned by a bearded man has just sued one of our own dear friends for - you wont believe it- voicing his opinion in his personal blog! The PJ feels that just because a person has a blog, does not mean he should write what he feels. "He can always post pictures!!" she exclaimed animatedly. The bearded man nodded in agreement. According to the PJ “only Journalists should be allowed to voice or pen down their opinion. The others should just shut up and listen…preferably to Yen Dee TV.” Boogle, the company that owns Flog Spot were not available for comment but a company spokesperson confirmed that Registration of Flogs have almost tripled overnight. So peoples we all have to very careful about what we put in our blogs and must not in any ways pointedly write about anyone or anything unless our name rhymes with Murk Ha Butt.

Anyways lets leave that aside and concentrate on the post of the week. This week I thought I will bring you a round up of news from around the country and the world, unlike the jabber I usually put in here. This post I hope will open your eyes to the possibilities err I mean to the happenings around us.

1. The war in Hiri Panka has considerably increased the temperature of Jennai a city in Manil Padu. Lawyers in this city have decided to go on a rampage to protest the Hindian government’s heinous policy of non interference in another country’s internal affairs. "This is irresponsible and violates every principles of justice" said the lawyers in righteous anger.

2. The Chief Election Commissioner Mr Comepalaswamy has asked the government to remove Mr Davin Pawla from the post of Election Commissioner. The government has given the suggestion due consideration and thrown it in the nearest dust bin.

3. Meanwhile Tackistan is expected to communicate the results of its investigations into the Hindian Governments investigations into the 27/12 attack in Tumbai. Right now they are weighing their words. It is rumored that they are rather heavy!

4. In a news that gladdened the cockles of this reporters heart, Asatyam Computers, informed it employees that their salaries had been credited to their bank accounts. Personally this reporter feels that the employees should get together and whip the tainted a*** of their ex CEO Mr Kaju Kamalingam for endangering the company without a thought to the future of the thousands of people it employs directly and indirectly, not to mention the beating it gave to the credibility of Hindian companies!

5. Hindia is considering tightening rules as more and more Mangladeshis are found to be overstaying their welcome in the country. The Home Ministry has asked for suggestions from the External Affairs ministry on how to ensure that visitor from the country do not overstay. A ministry official said under conditions of anonymity "As if we have a clue LOL!!!" He was seen ROFL after the statement.

6. The scion of the Bandhi family, Mr Bahul Bandhi has said that speaking from personal experience he can confidently say that the VeeJayPea’s plot to divide and rule the country will not work. The VeeJayPea leadership have refused to comment on the same but it is learnt that an inquiry has been ordered into the leakage of classified information from the party office.

7. A new Follywood film will give viewers a ring side view of the industry says a news report. The script will of course be contrived like most Follywood scripts. “If viewers want the reality, they should join Follywood” chuckled Mr Yarnwala a Follywood scriptwriter. Then he dissolved into laughter giving his 400 pound frame a much needed workout.

8. And finally news from the sporting arena. The Eye See See has withdrawn the Champs Trophy from Tackistan citing security concerns. However the Eye See See has assured Tackistan that it will ensure that international cricket is played in the country provided the venue of the match is outside Tackistan.


This news report post was bought to you by Cilverine the alter ego of Silverine who has err retired from blogging...for now.

33 comments:

Nitram said...

First on your thinkpad and now here?
This is exactly the kind of thing that would make me NOT want to be born(SHUDDER) as a female journo whose last name vaguely resembles Mutt!!
:D
May i suggest that you copyright(left and center too for good measure!) this blog post, before the news channel plagiarize it and pass it of as "BREAKING NEWS"!
:P

Rex said...

@Nitram- I think that's a great idea.
@Anjali- You should license your posts under a Creative Commons Non-Commercial Share-Alike license. (I mean u won't obviously go after the commercial copycats with a lawyer, but it should still be worth something :) )

3xsoncalvary said...

Whats the deal man? Whats with people getting sued for voiving their opinions on blogs?

SloganMurugan said...

hahahha! rotfl

Prasanth said...

Absolutely stunning stuff! Even predictability can be amusing can't it?

thomman said...

Well what can i say other than "Brilliant!". Maybe you should start a weekly news report from now on in this blog. And I demand Cilverine to return back!

mathew said...

Cilverine, the other day I was walking past Flogville and found someone Barkhing at a poor flogger and the sight was Dutterly disgusting!! Infact I had even thoughts of running away to Tackistan watchin all that!! But then I introspected for a moment and took inspiration from a blog post titled ‘My experiments with Fraud’ written by Mahatma Kaju who eloquently wrote about the sufferings of being a fraud. Specifically a particular incident where due to poor bandwidth in Hyderabad-Villa (where this blogger is currently living) he had resorted to watching TV in the community hall. All eyes were tuned into a particular show about trees, shot outdoors under a beautiful ‘Peepal tree’...And then someone asked a stupid question ‘Should we the people allow the Peepal tree to grow or cut it down’…

And that’s when one a branch from the ‘Peepal tree’ fell on the anchor’s head!!

ap said...

hahaha..Nice dig!!!

Pramod Abraham said...

This is definitely murky waters to thread on.But was surprised there is no news from Kallu-land like Chinarayee Pijayan charge sheet has been dropped due to non-materiality concept.Comrade Chinarayee Pijayan has mean while is working overtime to have a stalemate rather than a checkmate.

MC said...

i am thinking of "patties own country"..hehe..but i guess in any case boogle is not supposed to give out the identity of the flogger..that said, this is a sign that finally, we are being heard and people are getting scared of blog-power.

Usha Pisharody said...

Rofl!!!

Totally, totally!

But yes, the points raised by the first two commentors are worthy of note and merit, lest we see this news this evening as the Week the Wasn't!!!

I imagines Lola Kutty reading this, an in fact muttered mallu ishtyle, rigth through, and practically dissolved into paroxysm of laughter!!

It's taken me some time to clamber back onto the chair to post this comment!

Boogle's Floggers on Flogsopt rock, esp your alter ego!!

Indyeah said...

ROFL and more...
Came because of Usha who generously provided the link and shared this gem..:D
THis is great!The bearded Uncle can now rest in peace...err.....heave a sigh of relief.....and Mutts abound these days kinda like trolls you know..

I loved this one..:D
lemme pass the word...on this gem


@Usha lol @Lola Kutty!:D

Amey said...

If everybody keeps doing this, psychologists treating dyslexia are going to make a fortune.

Still thinking said...

Hey Cilverine,
You just got urself a fan gurl! Knowing how infrequent Silverine is in posting new posts, I'll be glad if you could just lend her a keyboard.

Cool one! :)

thomman said...

@mathew: too good man too good, barkhing! lol

Binsy said...

Loved every bit of it...really great idea... :))

ursjina said...

:)
But the mutts would still bark and bite too

rm said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
@lankr1ta said...

Holy god! You make the News so much better sounding... Cilverine!

Chirag said...

Ahh...Brilliant, too funny.

Gopinath's "Artickles" said...

Superb humor, Silverine - from another humor blogger! Take a bow for this one!

Radhika Ganesan said...

LOLz ! Wonderful post !

Sashu... said...

Lolz!! Roftl :))

hilarious the post! de satire juz shines thru!! n de content juz leaves a mark, no matter!! i like your post, very much indeed :)

~==[[[ Abhi ]]]==~ said...

Aha, nice dig. Loved the rhymes, took me back to my nursery days. Cilverine ROXX!

Deepti said...

Nice nice .. like i had commented in your earlier post .. whatay fall from grace :P

Wanderlust said...

Very aptly sarcastic post. Damn these hypocrites !!

Cynic in Wonderland said...

Bery bery mice.

yamini nair said...

Interesting post...

litterateuse said...

ROFL! Got here fro Rada's; kicking myself for not bumping into this blog earlier. You're a riot!

Become difficult to call a staid a staid, eh? Not when bloggers' freedom is questioned. Tarkha Nutt!

Nice one! Will be back for more :)

-gauri

-Poison- said...

ohh my god.... [:D] that was a funny funny funny post!

silverine said...

Thank you for the comments freinds! Sorry for not replying individually due to work commitments!

Pratz said...

lolz...yen dee tv...thts brilliant :P....

Bullshee said...

Oi! How come mine didn't get published??!!!