Monday, June 21, 2010

Groomed to desperation

My cousin brother had just got admission in this Management Institute. On the first day of class, he was busy getting ready when his Grandfather, an ex army officer called from Kerala. Cuz brother ignored the call as he was getting very late. But gramps kept calling. Putting his phone in silent mode he went to class and during lunch break called his grandfather who had by now notched up about about 456 missed calls approximately.

Grandfather (yelling): I've been calling you since morning. Why didn’t you pick up the phone!!!
Cuz bro: I was getting late appachcha and then I was in class...
Grandpa (still yelling): That is no excuse!!!!!!!!! I wanted to tell you something important....
Cuz bro: *gulp* Sorry appachcha...
Grandpa (yelling more loudly): I don’t want to hear your bloody sorry!!!
Cuz bro (now panicking): What happened Appacha, is Ammachi fine? Something happened?
Grandpa (grouchily): Yes, yes, she is fine.
Cuz bro (panicking more): Then it must be mum or dad...
Grandpa: They are fine too.
Cuz bro (losing his cool): Then who is it!!!!!
Grandpa: Don’t shout!! I wanted to remind you to shave before going to class. Today is first day no! And to polish your shoes and make sure your shirt is ironed the way I taught you.
Cuz bro: Bl$#%y F@&!ing Sh#T!!!
Grandpa: What did you say!!
Cuz bro: Nothing appachcha. I gotta go….
Grandpa: Bye mone, and don’t forget to trim your nose hair....
Cuz bro: *SLAM!!*

His new friends sitting at the table were then treated to an amazing display of pyrotechnics when their docile looking classmate with an army hair cut, picked up a large text book and thumped the table again and again till it was reduced to pulp. He then walked off in a huff. They now keep a safe distance from him.

14 comments:

- Sugar Cube - said...

LOL :D

RGB said...

Heights of desperation, eh? Shave, shoes...jeez! Moral of the story: Children remain children and grandchildren remain grandchildren no matter how old they get. Parents and Grandparents remain the wise-lot who are supposed to give their sagely advice big or small, whether you like it or not! Perfect start to my afternoon siesta (oops, did I just say that, I meant, 'session at work' actually)

Kiran said...

If I was grampa, I'd have jumbled up the verb and the subject - just to make things a li'l more interesting. Something like:

"Polish your beard, shave your shoes, iron your nose hair, and trim your shirt"

:D

thomas said...

Hehe, my family now got used to the fact that "pothinte cheviyil vethamothiyittu karyamilla". I shave once in a fortnight, never iron my shirts, and never wear 'polishable' shoes.

Reminded me of my friend who, for his 1st class for his MS in US, dressed tip top, completely formal, with full sleeve shirt, executive pants and polished shoes.....but to his utter dismay, his professor comes to class in Bermuda shorts and T-shirt.

One Weird Guy said...

can totally picture the scenario in my head...

Grayquill said...

Older people forget the number of years it took for their normal to be normal and they forget young people have youth, energy, ability to adapt on the run, and handle problems with simple ingenuity.

The Holy Lama said...

And all with when he did have an army cut:D

Arjun said...

What a caring grandpa... How I wished mine was like this ;)

Nona said...

The hair will grow back and he can tried fashionable stuff later! Anyways, it is going to two years to get off with a degree, no?

Sashu... said...

Hilarious!! hehe...poor chap!!

Destiny's child... said...

My heart goes out to your cousin brother. Poor, poor chap! Can't stop laughing...:D

gkam said...

Ah grandparents! :|

Cones said...

Haha :) I hope that 456 was an exaggeration.

hammy said...

What a nice appachan.

If only I had someone like that to give the timely advice about nosehairs... (sigh)

Well, nothing to be done now. I guess I should have figured out myself that braiding them wouldn't really be seen as cool.

So much for popularity.