Thursday, October 23, 2008

When the Boss is away...

Dear Boss,

Just a small mail to tell you how much I am missing you. Please come back. I know that you and your family deserve this hard earned vacation but you have certain duties too you know…if I may put it that way.

Let me tell you of the happenings in office while you are away.

1. I have taken your place as Bulldog now. I am sorry we called you that. (Which means they must be calling me Hitler, imperialist and slave driver too... *sob*)

2. People are wondering if you have picked me up from NIMHANS. And a certain group of people are scouring the HR manual to ascertain if "mentally challenged" people come under the purview of our "Equal Opportunity” employment guidelines.

3. I did not know that Foxy needs to be guided like a spastic from his chair to the meeting. He got lost yesterday and landed up in another meeting where he took some serious notes. His handwriting is very nice though.

4. Mr. IT Architect is driving everybody up the wall. He keeps his servers droning (he says it is humming) throughout the day. The notice next to the sever that says "Do not switch this off" has become "Switch this damn thing off". Currently he has asked for a security camera to focus on his work station to catch the culprits. We tried to circumvent the camera like in those Hollywood movies to no avail. Then we hit upon a brilliant idea! Bribe the Security man. It worked!! The security camera is now turned off from time to time so that we can switch the servers off. Mr IT Architect thinks he is spooked tee hee. It is fun btw.

5. Got to tell you about Ms Blah Blah. When you come back allow me to prostrate before you in absolute admiration. I came close to strangling her about 450 times yesterday. After the 451st attempt, they had to restrain me and HR asked me to take the day off. Then she slapped Ms Blah Blah. I protest! That was not very professional. I want my rightful chance to slap her too hmmpph!

6. Most of the people here are getting themselves treated for CMTD (compulsive multiple tab disorder). The treatment it is hoped will allow them to surf the web without tabs when you are not around.

The list is long, and right now I am realizing what it is you put up with. 12 very individual individuals of which one is cracked, one is absent minded, one thinks he is spooked and one goes blah blah blah and the rest are always browsing the web.

So Boss, please come back soon. I promise to behave myself in the future. *sob*

Your very sad Marcom Manager,

Silverine

41 comments:

Iya said...

oh man..not everyone misses "the boss on leave" but then not everyone is blessed with a team like this...

Anonymous said...

How insulting!! Calling a bulldog by the names Silverine and Boss!!

Anonymous said...

That wasn't notes about the meeting Boss. That was my foolproof plan to assassinate Silverine!

Anonymous said...

I destroyed the switch baby. Whatchya gonna doooo? Whatchya gonna dooo?

Anonymous said...

I'm gonna sue Silverine and HR for harassment. Better stay out of this Boss!

Anonymous said...

You bloody Macri manager. Don't disturb me while I'm cruising in my yacht. I can handle all of the above people, but.........but.......NOT YOU!!!!

Anonymous said...

Email from others:

Boss, help. Send silverine on vacation. You've taught us our lesson. YOU ARE LESSER OF THE TWO EVILS. In fact in comparism, you're not even evil.

Your humble slaves

--xh-- said...

poor boss - let him have his time in peace.. and let the employees suffer you - after all, it will help them to earn good karma... :P

scorpiogenius said...

Oh CMTD, I suffer a lot from this...and yes, especially when my authorities are away..:)

Alameen said...

"surf the web without tabs"
so very true..

Boss,
Come back soon. We want more daily news..

Anonymous said...

Well.. ahem.. another fifty grand would ensure the camera is switched off for atleast a week :D
*psst!* no switch... pull... plug...

silverine said...

Thomman: ROFL!!! Namichu!! That was too good dude!!! :))

Iya: I am indeed blessed ;)

Browser: LOL!! Remove the word "humble" and "slaves" and it sounds just right!!

--xh--: Actually we are having some good fun, not that we don't when he is around, but its a different kinda fun! :)

Scorpio: When the boss is away it is time to do away with CMTD. :)

Al Ameen: :) He is not coming back anytime soon from the look of the vacation photographs! :)

Security Guard: LOL!! You are a life saver! dude!! :)

Abhi said...

You don't even spare him to have some time with his family eh! So cruel. :)

Reminded me of my boss. Once when i went to him for a leave, he had a long look at the application and said, "Son, you're a bachelor, so you can take leave whenever you want. No need to plan them as per your kids' holidays or wife's leaves. So i can't grant this leave"

The bugger went on leave during the same dates that i'd wanted to go! Since then it's not Bulldog that i use to refer to him :D

Unknown said...

hey....my boss is leaving tomorrow for 50 days...!!!
:((((
I think i ll also miss him too much...sob sob

Pramod Abraham said...

Wondering what your workplace will be when you are out of office. Will your colleagues hire a DJ and have a blast?

Amey said...

one is cracked, one is absent minded, one thinks he is spooked and one goes blah blah blah and the rest are always browsing the web.

And you wonder why your boss needed a break?

Are you sure Foxy also didn't end up giving some "insightful inputs" in the other meeting? The other team may right now be trying to get him.

mathew said...

oru pushpa'anjali' neernu kollu ellaam sherri aavum..!!

~Mathew Namboodiri

Zahid said...

haha silverine Like ever.. A longer and worthier comment for you awaits at 'memoirs of a suppresed artist'

Anonymous said...

You promise to behave??

Hmm... You really think you can trick your boss into coming back?

And is reminding him about the perils in office the best method to incite his comeback?

Parul said...

do you still have the job or he hasn't read your page as yet :P

RukmaniRam said...

I can't wait for my advisor to leave- except of course, when I want a meeting with him.
when I get a job, am I going to become like this too?

Anonymous said...

True incident with the boss and vacation:

Once with tensions running very high with an account both Boss and I schedule a vacation for the same days - both glad to be rid of the other. Things were so bad that we did not even tell each other where we were going. Both being Club Mahindra members ended up in the same resort in adjusant rooms.

VIDYA said...

Maybe you should hack his orkut, facebook,.... a/c and chnge the password, with the prospect of putting up holiday pictures gone, he ll prly come back :D

Jagjit said...

omg, this is funny! post as well as comments...

Anonymous said...

Hehe Foxy is hilarious. And seeing the other comments, I am beginning to wonder if I took a wrong stand! Looks like all your characters are here :D
Btw you have been tagged.

Anonymous said...

Still going strong eh babes? Just stumbled again to see how things are moving at your end..

rgds

J.J ... a.k.a arrogantly.com

Elithraniel Arawion said...

hahaha.... i sympathize wit u :)... nice post btw.. had me laughin hard :P

Anonymous said...

Funny, witty, amusing and pleasing besides some excellent writing. Totally blown away by your blog kiddo!! Keep writing!

Vedika

Anonymous said...

been a reader to ur blog for long...but this time, not only the blog, but the comments are also hilarious!! u r too good gal..thumbsup!!!!!

Philip said...

It's so sad that neither Bulldog nor Foxy nor the others know what you write about them :|

By 'promise to behave myself' you mean that you won't do your evil deeds, then please rescind your promise.

Sparkling said...

Lol!

I was smiling through out the post. Brilliant humour!

I'm sad you've to go thru' all this when your boss is away, hope he comes back soon ;)

Mind Curry said...

looks like somebody is having fun at the office!

happy diwali :)

Unknown said...

Hey! can I get recruited to that team??... i too "fit" the "mis-fit" bill...:D

I'm in a terrible dilema...Should I laugh more from reading your post or the comments to the post...:D

Pratz said...

lolz........have fun....

Anonymous said...

Hey - I thought this all sounded pretty normal. Except the part that you want your boss to come back, whaa--?? Where I come from; when the boss is out, everyone celebrates by surfing more (on the web). But now I don't know if we can do that anymore since they installed cameras right above our heads this past week. Time to invest in those computer "glare protectors" aka the-amazing-hide-your-internet-surfing gizmos? Perhaps.

silverine said...

Happy Diwali all!

Abhi: Pity you! I have a nice boss! :)

Chirpy Paro: 50 days? :O I would resign if my boss left for 50 days!

Pramod:lol!!

Amey: Anyone tries to poach Foxy and Boss will tear them apart! :)

Mathew: lol!!

Zahid: Nice to see you buddy! :)

parul: I still have my job hehe!

Rukmini: Well, when my boss is a real decent human being and when he is not around my job sort of doubles! Hence the appeal to come back! :)

Browser: LOL!!! That was hilarious!! :))

Vidya: Unfortunately don't have an Orkut or Facebook account! :)And thanks for the smiley link!

Cris: Thanks for the tag. Hammy has tagged me with the same too! :)

Jinu: Nice to see you buddy! Please blog!

Alithraniel: Thank you dear! :)

Vedika: Thank you! :)

Roshny: Thank you gal! I loved the comments too! :)

Philip: No need to rescind! I cannot be good. Genetic defect you see! :p

still thinking: Thank you gal! :)

MC: Happy Diwlai to you too doc! What a kickass week it was at your blog. Loved to see some peoples asses flying all over the place! ROFL!!!

Abraham: lol!! Thanks for the compliment! :)

Pratz: Fun will start when he is back and I am freeee! :p

Z: Ah! We have a nice Boss you see, who is least bothered if we surf the web as long as the job gets done! :)

Diana said...

i don't remember what songs norah jones played but i remember her playing two johnny cash songs and one wilco song.

confucius said...

ROFTL...

But there is least chance that your boss will be missing you...:).
I pity that poor soul...

Anonymous said...

When Silverine Is Away

Dear Silverine,

Just a small comment to tell you how much I am missing you. Please come back. I know that etc etc etc etc...

Get back here Anjs. I want the next post. And I want it on my desktop ASAP.


Hmm... pretty please?

Macadamia The Nut said...

I'm Foxy's fan
:D After reading your previous posts about him
Muhahahahahahaaa

silverine said...

Diana: Really? Thats brand new information!!

Confucius:Him missing us? I would love to believe that! :p

Hammy: So sweet! *hugs* Next post on Sunday! Promise! :)

Nutmac: How dare you! I demand an immediate withdrawal of allegiance from Foxy fan club to my (non existent) fan club!!!! grrr
:)