Monday, September 22, 2008

What’s in a name, namme, nname or nnamme?

“Where is Rajesh?” asked the Boss.
“Which Rajesh?" I countered. "The one with two R's in his name or two A's or with two S's?”
“The guy with the two J's” replied the Boss.
“Ah! He is on leave today.”
"@#$%"

Boss had reasons to be peeved. Rajjesh was our single point of contact with the Sales Tax people and we needed some tax queries addressed for the CEO before the end of the day. He was in a spot now. So we, i.e. the Boss and I decided to ask around the office for people who could help us.

First we went to the Finance department. Besanth was the right guy we were told, but he was in a meeting with the Auditor. His colleague Girish was on a conference call while Asha, another colleague was on half day leave. Since this was a Sales Tax matter we were told that Bbesanth from Pre Sales would be the next best person to talk to. But Bbesanth from Pre Sales was not in his seat and his colleague Raman was busy. Raman however informed us that Assha from Sales may able to help us. Assha was helpful but she needed to clarify certain matters with Rraman her boss before she gave us any info she said. Rraman was traveling but his assistant manager Sanjay was very helpful. Sanjay directed us to Manjunath who introduced us to Girrish who was able to shed some more light on the matter.

Soon we had 75% of the information we needed and took the papers to our Legal Counsel Sanjayy for final whetting before submission. Sanjayy took a look at the papers and directed us get the papers stamped by his assistant. We went over to his assistant Maxine’s desk who stamped the papers and asked us to submit the stamped papers to Latha the corporate counsel. Latha gave us the final approval after she had her assistant Manjjunaath to read it over once. On our way back to our floor, we met Maxxine who was of no help to us so we ignored her.

Despite our best efforts we could not get the remaining 25% of the information we needed and by evening we had to face an uncomfortable truth that we had covered every single English alphabet twice over but for the alphabet “Z”. Err... what I meant to say was that by evening we had to face the uncomfortable truth that we did not have all the information the CEO wanted.

But then our ever dependable consultant Zarine came to our rescue and with the help of Zarine, we were finally able to cover all the English alphabets twice over. I mean...with the help of Zarine we were able to address all our sales tax queries. We handed over the completed info that the CCEO (formerly CEO) had asked for, to his secretary Zarrine.

And since we met with success in our venture, we i.e. the Boss and I have decided to not change our names to “Bboss” and “Annjjalli” as suggested by Lattha’s numerologist.

33 comments:

--xh-- said...

ROTFL... suuperr posst, silverrline... hilarious... :)

| Balu | said...

My friends in school believed in a diff school of numerology. They would cut names short, by taking away vowels. So I was called Blu and names like Sreedevi became SrDev =P (well yes, they let one vowel be.. just so that it "makes sense")

Hari said...

All hail red tape... and garbled names!!

Machiavelli said...

There are worse name plights...Imagine a young and single chap stuck with a name that reminds every true-bloodded mallu christian of his or her own father...Uneasy lies the head that wears the name

chirpy-paaro said...

heheh...Awesome one!!!...
Simply loved it!!!

silverine said...

xh: :p Thanks!

Balu: Numerology is a craze nowadays!

Hari: Well this was not red tapism but the new craze amongst everybody and anybody to add additional alphabets to their names after paying huge sums to numerologists, for better luck in life! :)

machiavelli: LOL!! Something tells me the person is you!

Chirpy Paro: Thanks gal! I see you got the post like -xh-! :)

Dhanush said...

ROTFL. :). Excellent Humour

I loved the way you scripted it, from changing the spelling they way you and your boss understood, to how they mentioned. Brilliant!!.

Sriram said...

LOL!!
Well I'm still Sriram here, unless someone wants to make it Tzreiraumm :)

Amey said...

If you had changed your names, Rajjesh would have been in his place ;)

I am calling you Aannjjaallii from now on :D

Binny V A said...

From now on, I will be called Binnnny. Why stop at 2 when you can have 4?

mathew said...

Well jigsaw puzzle fits now with the previous post..even 'Knorr' didnt save itself from the ignominious doom.;-p

btw very innovatively crafted post..loved it..

Ms Cris said...

Your work keeps getting more complicated each day! If I met two people with the same name I get a headache, three means world-spinning around me and you live everyday with a thousand!

But yeah I know what you mean, have come across people I knew for sure would be spelled abc only to be told its adc, because some-ologist thought b looked ugly. I am sure my stars and numbers work great only when its Cris, putting an h will surely disturb some important numerical function.

scorpiogenius said...

Well, I used to read ur pseudonym as Silverline for quite some time.. That made more sense, doesnt it? ;)

Oh, whats in a naamme Silverline??

silverine said...

Dhanush: Thanks buddy! :)

Sriram: According to numerology, you will be Srriram or Sriraam :p Now that will be Rupees one lakh only, my consultation charges! Please pay asap! :|

Amey: Thanks Ammeyy! :p

Binny: LOL!! Add an extra "Y" also for more luck!!

Mathew: lol!! I guess its time for them to change their numerologist! :p

ms cris: It is a craze that is filtering from Mumbai to Blr nowadays! We have several people with double alphabets in their name in my office! :)

scorpiogenius: Absolutley!! Whats in a name, Sccorrpiogennius!! :p

~==[[[ Abhi ]]]==~ said...

Reminded me so much of the name problems in data interpretation problems in CAT :-). Awesome list of names, i wonder where you get the time to think about all this between your tax queries and other vital jobs :d

Iyer Education said...

i guess it all makes sense...

now i realize why your blog extra O in it...

pomanam wouldnt have made any sense...

you are way ahead of all the numbers ;)

Santosh said...

:o) lol ! yeh sab ajeeb incidents aap hi ke saath kyon is the question :)

i have nothing to do with numerology !!! but still the since the time i have shifted to bengaluru ; people here do zabardasti ka numerology with my name ! They add an extra H on thier own and spell it as "Santhosh" ; so many mails even from office collegues is marked this way ! :o) even when the mail address clearly is santosh.rao :)

Avisha said...

Chanced upon your blog and was totally hooked! Over the past one week, your blog has served my break-from-work routine... To give you a sample - oh, this code is taking a long time to compile, let me read one post... oh my god, I have been working for the past 37 mins without a break.. let me read one more post.. oh hell, have just read 3 posts today, lemme just finish all on this page.. get the idea? Just now, I finished reading all your posts. :) want to thank you for the smiles that your posts have been me. I hope you keep writing, for I'll never stop re-visiting your blog. And yes, I am toying with the idea of sending in one of your posts to my boss.. , just in case he wonders how my productivity has really reached the all-time-low mark, I can just prod him to follow my footsteps. :)

idli ideas said...

wow!!!

btw, do you remember me?

Karthik said...

Its more common among film personalities.

Rosshan Andrews is one example that immediately comes to my mind :-)

Nikhil Narayanan said...

Silverine,
I have actually changed my name to N1kh1l

It seems having two 1s will take me places.

-Nikhil

Praveen said...

a clever jab at all those numerology obsessed celebrities as well as non-celebrities...hehe...ROTFL.
halfway thru the post, I almost went mad with the name changes:P

Tom said...

"The fault lies not in our names, but in ourselves".

What's in a name eebill s(ill)berine??

Browser said...

You took the wrong approach. The next time you want information or gossip (it works both ways), always approach the lowest staff in the office. They would have it or would get it for you. Ofcourse, then you would owe them but that's another matter. Always works - sometimes I think the saying that "these walls have ears" refers to them.:-)

Browser said...

BTW, am planning on changing my name to BrrOowsSer, but I can't find a damn numerologist who will endorse this for free :-(

Abraham Menacherry said...

Jayalalithaa...:D

I guess that was the most famous one.

but I am of the opinion that mallus lost their right to comment on names long back....:( We would win the "worst-named-people-on-earth" award hands down!

nitin said...

i m also planning to change my name to niitin .. someone told its good or me to have 3 i in my name

:-)

Ajith said...

Numerology is the latest craze and some smart guys are making money out of it. I have no idea, how people can be so Stupid (including CM). This is heights of superstition. Changing the destiny by adding a few alphabets - wow! I salute the brain who invented this innovative fraud. 'Mothathil spelling mistaka'

Toe Knee said...

Tell me about it - should I be Toe Knee or Tony

silverine said...

Abhi: Thank you! :)

Iyer Education: lol! Wish I cud take the credit, but unfortunately "poomanam' is a perfectly sound Malayalam word!

Santosh: "yeh sab ordinary incidents aap kyon exaggerate nahi karthe" is the question! :p

Avisha: Thanks girl!! You made my day even brighter than what it was !! :)

idli ideas: Of course I remember you buddy! Nice to see you!! :)

Karthik: Not any more! Now its ordinary folks too :)

Nikhil: Sorry "N1kh1l" wont do. No numerals or special characters allowed. Only extended alphabets! :)

Praveen: Thank you! Clever of you to notice!! :)

Tom: "The fault lies not in our names, but in ourselves". Absolutely spot on! And that nick sounds very lolcatish. Me likes it!! :)

browser: Reg office info, point noted. And 'BrrOowsSer' is a lovely name!! I suggest you try it. If it brings good luck, stick with it. If it brings bad luck make it 'BrrowSer' and try again! :p Nice to see you btw!

Abraham: Yep! She started it!! :)

Nitin: Dont forget me when you get rich and famous! :|

Ajith: You are absolutely right!!! How can mere alphabets change your fortune. Then the whole world will be full of millionaire's. And if that happens, then we will have rich millionaires and poor millionaires. The rat race never ends!!

toe knee: Your name is perfect as it is! :)

The MEANDERthal man said...

new moronology is what i like to call it :)

Sham said...

Tired of correcting people that my name is sham and not shyam or syam I nw stopped it. I even introduce myself as shyam...Sham only for official purpose. Learned to live with it.

wandering mistral said...

This is hilarious! I think a lot of people missed the point here!