Saturday, July 14, 2007

Joys of being an underdog

"Cheta I want to tell you something" I said to my brother. M looked up at me warily. Something is always amiss when I call him "cheta". It is a precursor to "I hit someone with a bike" or "I jumped the traffic light and got fined." I get full attention from the diligent cleaning of his bike.

"There is something I need to tell you" I started. His eyes widen like saucers and he croaks "you spoke about this to anyone???” I nod my head to indicate a 'no'. This is bad news for him, because only when I am in real trouble do I go to him surpassing the Lower Court (eldest bro), High Court (mom) and Supreme Court (Dad) hierarchy in my house.

"There is a guy in your life!!" he said springing up like a Jack in the Box. Judging from his expression it looks as though I have just said "cheta I am gay". In fact I think he would have heaved a sigh of relief if it had been that. Like most elder bros he dreads the day I will say that I have a guy in my life.

"errr hmmm!!!" I squirm. I can almost hear the sharp intake of breath. “Ok tell who the f*&%r... err... I mean the guy is, NOW!!!!"

Silence from my side.

I can see him battling homicidal tendencies and fratricidal mania.

He tries a new tactic and asks with pseudo kindness through gritted teeth" Ok tell me , who it is, is it someone I know?"

I nod affirmation. I can almost hear him think... " Hail Mary give me patience full of grace or there will be a double murder in my hands today the Lord is with thee, I don’t want blood on my bike tires blessed are thou amongst women but if I take him some place lonely and blessed is the fruit of thy womb Jesus patience I pray for patience....."

So what is his name?
mmmm...
I promise I won’t lose my temper *grrrr*
*silence*
I swear I won't over react!!! *growl*
Motorola!
Motorola?
Yes
That is not even funny!!!
Seriously that is the name. Dad bought me this PDA and I came to tell you that I don’t know how to operate it.....

*if looks could kill then I would be wearing white robes with a halo on my head and playing some awful music on the Lyre since I don’t know how to play the Lyre. I would of course be sitting on cloud 456 where I have been banished so that the residents of cloud 9 do not have to hear the awful music I would be playing till eternity.*

ps. lots of things happened here which I cannot elucidate but I am so thankful to my PT teacher for teaching me to run really fast.

Lesson for the day for autocratic elder siblings: Don’t jump to conclusions and if you do, make sure you carry a parachute...or you can run really fast!


37 comments:

Dhanya said...

LOL.. You rock as usual :)

Nanditha Prabhu said...

i am an elder sibling too!
but younger ones are always the smartest lot!

paavam cheetan!

Anonymous said...

You my younger sis by any chance? Striking similarity :-o

Paavas

mathew said...

oo..oooh..how manage to keep the suspense till the end all time!!too good!!...esp i could almost visualise how your bro was reacting.family .berry berry phunny family indeed!!

just a jester said...

You might have got tired of hearing thist--That was hilarious!!

silverine said...

dhanya: Thank you :)

nanditha: I wouldn't mind a 'female' elder sibling :)

anon: :p

mathew : The suspense was unintentional. Was trying to show how people jump into conclusions of course with a lot of help from me :p lol!!!

just a jester: Thanks buddy :)

Di said...

u bought the A1200?! how good/bad/ugly/great is it? :)

ToOothlEss WOndeR! said...

Gosh.
sisterotrauma seems to bea an epidemic!

Fleiger said...

Now whom should we blame for misunderstanding???



P.S. Don't worry about lyre. From what I have seen (admittedly in movies and cartoons), lyre playing comes with halo, cloud and white dress. If not, I guess only 1% of people (I am assuming that to be number of people who learn to play lyre + naturally gifted) would make it to heaven.

Alexis said...

That was a nice one...really hilarious. Poor M. Next time he will catch you and then you will get what you avoided today :-)

But I like the judicial setup in your family. So for matters than cannot be settled in the court you go to the mafia. Nice to have a mafia don as a elder brother. And his version of 'Hail Mary' was too good.

~==[[[ Abhi ]]]==~ said...

Why on earth do all younger sis's behave in the exact same way? I just hate it when mine comes to me and cribs over things that deserve a slap 1st and questions later!

BTW forgot to tell:Hilarious as usual!

ap said...

rocking......

Poor Soul!!!!!M

The heirarchy thing is very similar like what we have at home..except mafia is missing..my younger bros are twins!!! so there- its them first ...then me , mom and dad in that order....


PS :btw it seems St Michaels was indeed into killing Devils...came across a picture ...

silverine said...

Di: Still checking it out :)

toothless wonder: You too affected? lol

fleiger: Now thats a relief to know!! lol I am talking about the Lyre playing thingie :))

alexis: "matters than cannot be settled in the court you go to the mafia" Brilliant! Never looked at it that way! It does seem so ;)

Abhi: "that deserve a slap 1st and questions later!" LOL!! It is sooo nice to irritate some people :p

AP: Thanks buddy :) You have twin trouble er.. I mean younger brothers? I pity you :)) St Micheal is the demon slayer and St George the Dragon slayer. But the Dragon looks like a demon and vice versa :)

Fleiger said...

Oh well, lyre playing thingie done, now back to my original question.

adheesh said...

A mafioso's son sits at his desk writing a Christmas list to Jesus. He first writes, "Dear baby Jesus, I have been a good boy the whole year, so I want a new..." He looks at it, then crumples it up into a ball and throws it away.
He gets out a new piece of paper and writes again, "Dear baby Jesus, I have been a good boy for most of the year, so I want a new..." He again looks at it with disgust and throws it away.

He then gets an idea. He goes into his mother's room, takes a statue of the Virgin Mary, puts it in the closet, and locks the door. He takes another piece of paper and writes, "Dear baby Jesus. If you ever want to see your mother again..."

:))

Paro said...

Really hilarious :)

Anonymous said...

entammooo my sister did the same thing and I took off on a tangent just like your bro..wicked girl!!! :-)

manuscrypts said...

sigh..technology always gets between relationships...

the anon that said 'no' once said...

this is among the funniest posts i've read ROTFL.
could see it coming, burst out at the end nonetheless.

phenomenal stuff.

Bullshee said...

Ha ha ha! HIlarious! Especially the Hail Mary!!!

Your poor bro.....nice that he's ready to commit a bloody here and there for his sis!

shruti said...

hmm wish I had such macho brothers who would beat up any man that looked my way ...

silverine said...

fleiger: Well er...his fault ofcourse!!! :p

adheesh: ROFL!!! That was really funny!

Paro: Thank you :)

Anon: Serves you right!!! :p

the guy who said 'no': Thank you :)

manuscrypts: lol!!!

annie: :p

bullshee: Thank you :)

shruti: Well...it has his upsides and downsides.

Asterix said...

Man! you are evil!! I feel sorry for your poor brother :-)

Mishmash ! said...

I always missed an elder bro! u re lucky to have two :)) And I did have a guy in my life and since I didnt have an elder bro, had to put the bomb directly infront of my parents :D

Though I was expecting a twist at the end, it was nice to read how you built up all that tension :)
Shn

Fleiger said...

OK, I guess I walked into that one. But come on, give the guy some points for loving his sis enough...

?bLeAk?!! said...

Gee, I feel for your bro..

Anyway, my next phone will be a PDA too..

And if I were sent to cloud 9 I'll make them head bangers by learning to play a Lead guitar on cloud no. 456 first. :D

TheDawg said...

Elder brothers have special place in heaven for enduring little sisters like you. ( God , there better be one or ... )

Iceman said...

Lmao...

SP said...

:-)

Aa paavathine onnu verudhe vidu!!

wanderlust said...

the 'hail mary' bit was too good.
hilarious, as always.

pophabhi said...

Cloud 456 was cool.

LOL!! :)

Sreejith said...

pity the poor chettans who have to endure this! And you need to be sent to rehab.. you are addicted to humour! :D

nims said...

lol.. that was hilarious.

I had a wonderful time reading ur blog..[:)].Great posts..

fundoome said...

ROTFL

silverine said...

asterix: :)

mishmash: If I ever have to put a bomb like you then it will in front of this brother :)

fleiger: You call that love? :))

bleak:lol!! You maybe banished to hell :p

thedawg: Or else....ominous portends :))

iceman: :)

SP: naaah!! :p

wanderlust: :)

pophabhi:I guess people like me will nevr get to reside on cloud 9 :p

sreejith: :)

nims: Thanks girl :)

fundoome: :)

Umesh said...

:-)

The Guy Who Sits at The Desk said...

:)