The first gifts of the Season from other family members have started trickling in. My aunt gave me a beauuuuuuuuuuuuuutiful pack of heart shaped candles with glitter on them. I absolutely love them!!!!
Second gift is from a cousin brother. Hold you breaths girls. Trumpets sounds, cymbals clash as I open the gift.
IT IS A BOX OF GLITTERY EYE SHADOW !!!
( but the thought was nice)
Ok, this is it. That was the last straw on a gals fast sinking faith in the ability of most guys to buy a decent gift. I am now convinced that most guys are not gifted with the art of gifting ( corny line I know!! ) So here’s a guide for guys who are gifting-ideas-challenged and want to surprise the women* in their lives with that Perfect Gift. (* moms, sisters, girlfriends,wives, cousins sisters, colleagues etc.)
Warning: Please do not try this on men!
1. We do not like non stick pans. Please do not remind us of the drudgery of cooking for you.
2. We do not like crockery. It is a constant reminder that it needs to be filled with food.
3. But we love cookery books. Especially glossy ones with colorful pictures . Don’t ask me why Point No. 1 and Point No. 2 is disallowed when Point No 3 is allowed.
4. We like kitchen implements if they operate electronically and we are married ( or else you are in trouble, leave scene immediately).
5. We like candles. The fancier the better. Don’t ask me why! Just buy it!!
6. We love flowers, but stick to roses if you do not know about our likes and dislikes among the 200 other varieties available in the market.
7. We love artificial flowers, that is if you are onsite in the US or Europe.
8. We love perfumes, but please DO NOT BUY perfumes for us. We dont wanna smell like an oil slick! (Hint: Gift voucher)
9. We do not like aftershave. I know it smells wonderful.
10. Ditto for men’s deodorant. I know it does the same thing that a ladies deodorant does. grrrrrrrrr
11. We do not mind sarees if we are 21 and above. But please tell the shopkeeper that we will be coming soon to exchange it.
12. Ditto with books. But a subscription of Femina, Reader's Digest or Cosmo will be just fine.
13. We love jewelry but follow Point No 8 (Gift Voucher). Please remember a Rs 500/- Gift Voucher will not even get us an entry into a jewelry shop. The Gift Voucher should be in multiples of Rs.1000/- only!
14. It's true, Diamonds are indeed a girls best friend. (hint, hint)
15. We love gems but please tell sales girl our birthmonth so that she can give you our birthstone. We are very particular about this. However whatever our birthmonth, Diamonds are always welcome ;)
16. Everything that glitters is not gold for girls. So please go easy on glittery tops, shoes, handbags, lipstick and eyeshadows. Point No. 5 can be repeated here too.
17. We are extremely particular about our lipstick shade, so repeat Gift Voucher /Certificate here too.
18. If you are planning on buying lingerie for wife / girl
friend then “God help you!!!” Play safe, don't get caught consulting a Lingerie catalogue. Read it someplace safe.
19. We love chocolates. But we may not like chocolates as a gift because it is fattening. So it’s your call.
20. A weighing scale is not such a good idea of a present and can be potentially harmful to your skull.
21. We love paintings, but no nude women please... and vice versa.
22. We love crystals, especially those cute animals figurines in crystals.
23. Talking of crystals, we also like crystalware.
24. Teddy bears are acceptable if we are 12 years and below. Dolls also fall under this category!
25. Just because we are middle aged ( 50+) does not mean we do not appreciate flowers, so go easy on the Hot Water Bottles,prayer books and Shawls.
26. We love music CDs but who the heck is Laffy Taffy???? And Black Eyed Peas...? Is this some exotic vegetable? Please enquire about our taste in music from our friends before buying that CD.
27. If we are above 70, forget about the gift.....we would love to have you visit us.( ok senti rising to dangerous levels here, grandma I miss you * sniff* )
28. And ....the only brass that we wanna see, is on guys in uniform ;)